Secret About Men

 Another Related Article: What Men Want

Emile CurtoWritten by: Emile Curto


woman wondering what men secretly wantSome Secret about men, not in the negative sense as the word "secret" might sound. In this case, we take secrets to mean those things that women don't know about men. Men are less talkative and less open about deeper issues so they may come off as a mystery. So you may be grateful that we reveal some of their secrets here.


The Cave 


Ever wonder what happens when he goes into the 'cave'? What happens in the cave is possibly the greatest secret about men. Men are naturally independent, they need time alone. This means physically, emotionally, and just to think. When men go into their caves it’s a way to escape the stress of the world around them and be themselves. He doesn’t feel any pressure to please anyone because he is by himself. In this relaxed environment he’s better at thinking and processing issues he may be dealing with in life. Or he may just want to be alone and rest. Ladies relax, he doesn’t hate you, he just needs cave time.


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Do Men Cry 


You’ll probably never catch him, and he’ll probably never admit it. But a secret about men is they do cry, everybody cries. It’s the portrait that today’s culture paints which labels crying as weak, and that men don’t cry. In the past or in other cultures men cried openly. As much as they’ll deny shedding some tears they haven’t evolved. They may not cry as much as women, or over smaller issues, but they do. Does that mean they’re sensitive and caring? That’s another issue.



Asking For Directions 


Why is it that they don’t? Or in similar situations like assembling furniture, refuse help from anyone or the instruction manual. It’s because instinctively they are challenged by the task. It can turn into pride, but in the beginning men see these things as goals. Men are very goal focused, they see one objective at a time and aim for it. This is how their subconscious thinking works.



Men Think They Are More Attracted To Beauty over Personality 


Men are initially more attracted to beauty over personality than women are. Ask any men, and he’ll tell you it’s true. Does that mean personality means nothing to them? A shift happens when a man gets to know a woman over time. Regardless of how beautiful the woman is, her looks start to mean less and less to him. Then one of two things will occur depending on the man. The first is he will end the relationship. The second will occur if you have a better man, where personality and connection will start to become more powerful factors in attraction. After which her looks will “grow” on him. That's right, a secret about men is that they are just as vulnerable to love as much as the rest of us, they just don't want to admit it. Is it true that men are only interested in looks? Only at first stage of the relationship.



Men are Insecure 


So you thought you were the only insecure party in the relationship? Wrong! Another secret about men is that they are also insecure, just about different things. We have all come to the conclusion that a man should be confident, but that is not always the case. For example, when planning to go on a date, a man could start to worry about what to say and how to conduct himself so as not give a bad impression to his date. In addition, he could also be worried on what to do in order not to come across as a boring fellow. The illusion that men aren’t insecure can be from when he approached you and asked you out. He seemed confident right? We’ll what he didn’t tell you was it took him two hours and three shots to build up the courage to even step up to you. Men are also told that women like confidence in men, so as a result they force themselves to act confident.



Men are not Really Hard to Understand 


Wondering why he hasn’t called you? Why he didn’t say hi? He seemed distant today. With women these things can be a lot harder to understand. Not with men. 99% of the time there’s no hidden reason behind it, the reason is the simplest of the possibilities. He didn’t say hi because he didn’t see you or was distracted, he didn’t call you because his time frame is different than yours, and he was distant because he was just relaxing. Women tend to over think things, which just lead to unnecessary stress. The best way in learning about him is to ask and to understand that he’s a man; he’ll do things differently than you.



Why is he so Silent 


Sometimes it’s because he’s in his cave, and sometimes it’s because he’s thinking. A secret about men is that most of the time, it’s because he has nothing to say. Women are naturally expressive, they can talk and have no trouble finding things to talk about. Men on the other hand can talk, but may find it hard to come up with things to talk about. It doesn’t flow as naturally as women. A good exercise to practice if you want him to open up about something is to begin on that subject yourself. Ask him what his opinions are and he’ll find it easier to add in his thoughts. Men are also very focal thinkers, if you can come up with specific questions, he’ll know exactly what to talk about.



Men are not good at Guessing 


Even though most men are unable to put their feelings into words, a secret about men is that they are not very adept at interpreting the feelings of their partners when not put into words. You may be trying to communicate with him through indirect means without expressing yourself in words, don't be angry if he doesn't do what you expect; he probably didn't get the message. Words are the greatest portion of communication as opposed to reading emotions with men. All other factors are overshadowed. So if you have something you want him to know, get his full attention, and tell him clearly.


If you like him and you’re expecting him to pick up on your signs, he may not. Women tend to be more outgoing and this can come across as flirty. You may be flirting with him, but in his mind your just being another girl.


The reverse is also true, in that men tend to be more introverted by nature. So when you’re expecting signs from him to tell you he likes you, he thinks he’s already put them out there. Understanding these secret about men will help you know and get along with them better.



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