Bring Back the Spark
Another Related Article: How to
Connect with Him
There will come a time when things don't go the way we want them.
Same fact applies to the issue of relationships; there will likely be a time when you will need to make him
love you again, or bring back the spark in your relationship.
relationships evolve and go through lulls is important. Relationships are like boats in the ocean. Where the
passion and spark seem to be high at one point, then simmer down at another. This process repeats itself again
and again. Not understanding this can lead people to believe that they just don’t love each other anymore when
the boat is off a wave. They typically break-up, not understanding that the cycle is normal. Then re-enter their
next relationship where the same pattern occurs. Sticking it through,
knowing that this cycle is normal for everyone, is important in order to bring back the
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Most people grow up believing
that relationships are what Hollywood paints them out
to be, and then expect that
feeling of when you first met to last forever. In reality the feeling of first love is true and genuine, but
then evolves into something else, a bond where a more supportive and deeper connection exist. Where you feel
safe to tell the other person anything or feel like they understand you like no one else does. Where you feel
like you’ve known them for a lifetime. This deeper connection takes quality time together to form. With some
couples it happens through deep conversation. With others it happens from doing nothing together. Sometimes it’s
a combination of both. Trying to improve and remember that connection can help bring back the
The first step you need to
take to bring back the spark is to think back to the time before you and your partner got together. Try and
remember what it was like back then; how you lived your life. Of course, you had your own independent life
before you started going out together. One possible reason why the flare might have left is because you changed
from being your real self along the line. For example, it is likely that you were the kind of person that used
to put special care to how you look, but started taking less care of yourself after you both fell in love. In
the vast amount of time spent together you’ve grown comfortable with each other. Then day by day, you've been
getting more comfortable looking less attractive around them. Bring back the spark through the little things.
Take the time to look good and smell good around each other, even if you’re not going out for dinner but just
watching TV together. You don't have to spend a lot of effort like when you were first dating, but put in just a
The little things you did for
one another can help bring back the spark. When was the last time you wrote them a letter expressing how you
felt towards them? Or cooked their favorite meal with a glass of red? Don’t doubt that the little things
matter. In the beginning you could talk about nothing and you
still felt excited. What happened? Early in the relationship the nature of your conversations were finding out
about each other. It was new and exciting. New and exciting is the point here. Try doing new things together. Be
adventurous in your relationship. Look up questions that help couples grow closer together, questions that
you`ve never clued in on asking them. Do things that are new and exciting. Take up new hobbies, hang
out with different friends. This new environment can help bring back the spark in your
conversations in the beginning were also centered on expressing feelings of love toward each other. Miss them?
You’ve probably thought that since you've already said you hearts feelings for them they remember right? Words
like “I love the way your eyes compliment you hair”. Or “you’re the best thing that’s happened to my life”. When
people hear compliments and encouraging words endorphins are released in the brain causing them to feel good.
Simple words spoken can create an atmosphere, an intimate dynamic between two people. Make a habit of speaking
your heart to each other at least once a day. Such a small thing can take a relationship into great deepness
internet can be a massive source of ideas to bring back the spark. Use this tool of the century for your
marriage. It’s filled with great date ideas of fun and exciting places to go and things to do. You’re not
limited anymore to just you and you partners ideas.
are better than one right? The more the merrier correct? Get your friends together and explain what you’re going
through. How can you expect good advice if you’re not asking for any? Go on a group date, hang out with friends
together. This way your ideas can pool together and there’s less pressure on anyone to make the entire date go
well. Maybe you’ve been too closed off from the world. Community can be healthy in a relationship, where there’s
less focus on one specific person. People can have a better time in large groups
Are there small elephants in
the room? In a relationship fighting is normal and can even be healthy, but only if fights are handled
correctly. Most of the time unresolved hurt or unexpressed feelings are what people are left with when arguments
are over. These issues can be swept under the rug which may make bringing back the spark impossible until
resolved. They need to be brought out into the open and resolved before growing into bitterness towards each
other. Issues like these grow into something larger than what they should be if left unchecked. Bringing up past
issues can also lead to fights; if this is the case maybe a counselor would be advisable. If a counselor is too
expensive, what about the local pastor? Or an older couple? Someone with years of marriage wisdom who you can
run ideas by.
Most fights occur from
miscommunication and not fully understanding each other. We grow up not really understanding the opposite sex,
learning from mistakes or friends just as clueless as we are. Ask people of the opposite sex how they would feel
in certain situations, read books. Taking the time learning about the other sex can save a lot of trouble.
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Using the small things in
life to bring back the spark can mean so much to a relationship. With these tips, you’ll find that you still
love each other, you just had to stir it up.
in your relationship?
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